Our work is deeply relational. We don’t just work with skin—we work with people. And people bring emotions, expectations, and energy into every treatment.
That’s why understanding our client’s love language—their likes, dislikes, how they prefer to be communicated with, and seen—can be one of the most powerful tools in our businesses.
This goes beyond the Five Love Languages framework. It's about developing the emotional intelligence to read the room, interpret subtle cues, and meet our client where they are—without losing ourselves in the process.
We’re in the business of relationships and each client is different. Some love small talk. Some need silence. Some want to understand every product you’re using. Others want to just lay back and fall asleep.
Our job isn’t to become someone else, it's to observe and respond in a way that resonates with our clients. Which means, picking up on nonverbal cues, listening to what’s said (and unsaid), or being able to pivot without it disrupting the flow.
These small moments build trust. And trust is what keeps clients coming back—not just results.
Research shows that high emotional intelligence (EQ) is a major predictor of strong interpersonal relationships in service roles. In a 2023 review published in The CX Lead, emotional intelligence was linked to better customer retention, increased satisfaction, and even improved professional confidence. This means, recognizing our own state of mine, noticing the emotional energy our clients bring in, regulating our responses accordingly and being able to communicate clearly and compassionately.
This awareness helps us to adapt without overextending. We don't have to choose between adaptability and authenticity.
Adaptability isn’t pretending. It’s being rooted in who we are, while being flexible in how we express it.
Think of it like skincare itself: the core philosophy stays the same—support the skin’s natural function—but the application changes depending on what’s needed that day.
Our brand values, our tone, our ethos—they can stay consistent. But the delivery? That’s where we can shift. We can be the same esthetician and still hold space differently for a 24-year-old with acne and a 54-year-old going through menopause.
That’s not losing ourselves. That’s being skillful.
I also want to touch on energy. Our energy is felt by our clients.
If we're flustered, distracted, or energetically off, clients will sense it—even if we're technically doing everything “right.” If we're grounded, present, and intentional, that calm will transfer to them.
We’ve all had those days: running behind, skipped lunch, frazzled by texts. But when we step into the treatment room, the energy has to shift. Not just for them—but for us.
How we enter the space affects how our client feels in it. And that’s part of the treatment, too.
While the classic Five Love Languages (words of affirmation, quality time, gifts, acts of service, and physical touch) were created for romantic relationships, they can be adapted to our relationships within business too.
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Words of affirmation → Thoughtful feedback, personalized encouragement
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Acts of service → Anticipating needs: warm towels, offering water, remembering sensitivities
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Quality time → Being fully present and not rushed
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Physical touch → Mindful, intentional movements during massage or cleansing
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Receiving gifts → Small samples, handwritten thank-you notes, follow-up care
We won’t always know our client’s preference immediately—but if we're paying attention, they’ll show us.
I guess what I'm trying to emphasize is, connection is strategy.
When our clients feel truly seen, safe, and supported—they stay. They refer. They trust us with their skin. They tell their friends, their family, their coworkers.
And that level of trust isn’t built by a social media posts. It’s built slowly, session by session, with presence, empathy, and intention.
So remember, our protocols matter. Our training matters. But the true art of esthetics lives in how we make people feel.
Learn to read the room.
Take care of your energy.
Adapt, but don’t abandon yourself.
And above all—remember that you’re in the business of relationships.
